This blog is dedicated to addressing issues of common interest in America from a fool's (jester's) perspective. You can take it serious if you like, you can take it with antacid, or you can take it or leave it. The choice is yours young grasshoppers. I am here to address you America, so sit back in your office chair (not on company time) and let your mind take a journey into the world of Leon's mind. Better bring your helmets!
"It's a bird, no it's a plane, no sir it is our nuclear ambition flying away."
The food for weapons program seems to be working out well for the new guy in charge. We have food and they have a weapons program that we are not too fond of. We don't want them to have long range missiles and they don't want to starve, thus the trade. I wonder if I was right about this guy. Is he a kinder and gentler dictactor? Only time will tell.
Final thought, I wonder if North Korea's real angle in this trade off is to lull America into a false sense security until a Disney theme park is built in downtown Pyongyang and then when it is too late they start the missile program up again. Hmmmmmmm!
Apparently a wealthy but not overly bright banker decided to show the 99% (That's you and I) that your brain does not have to work in order for you to receieve a large salary. ( I didn't get any TARP money did you guys? I also didn't make millions of bad loans for a huge bonus either) The smarter than us guy decided to add insult to injury by writing "Get a real job" on the receipt. Real classy! J.P. Morgan then left a 1% tip on a $133.54 lunch bill.
I guess he really showed the waitress who the boss was. Hey banker, why don't you get a real job and stop stealing from widows and working guys for a paycheck. Hey buddy, you probably couldn't do the waitress' job even if you were given the opportunity. Maybe you should get an eye patch and learn to say arrrgghhhh! Pirate!
Now before anyone goes into the class warfare and the rich versus the poor nonsense let me be perfectly clear on this matter. This is not a story about rich versus poor. It is the story of stupid versus rational intellect and ego versus humility. That banker should be ashamed of himself. He would be if I was on the board of directors of the bank that he worked for because I would fire him or force him to clean the toilets for a week.
Maybe we should find out who this guy is and boycott the bank that he works for until he either goes and works the waitress' job for one week or gets fired. I personally want to see him forced to work at the eating establishment where he stiffed the lady for a week on her wages and no tips.
Don't you wish when products are being advertised that the whole story were being told? Here is a Chevy commercial that relays some of Chevy's history except the part where General Motors (GovernmentMotors) takes the TARP loan (handout) to stay a float. There is no mention of the debt restructuring that put the bondholders out and the union boys in charge of the car company. I wish someone would give me a car company for the way I vote. I almost forgot they got a car czar too.
It's a nice commercial but needs that punch of reality so I decided to add that punch of course. Here is how I would end the commercial "Chevy runs deep, on government money." Short, simple, and truthful.
I like how news outlets try and help a President's image out. Below is an article telling Obama to be more like Clinton. America hide your daughters! Well being the guy that I am I would like to help out El Presidente (SeniorDictator) too. Below is 10 things that I think America would like our President to do. Please do these things and leave the politics to someone that is qualified.
1) Participate in a rodeo as a rodeo clown 2) Do the Simpson's show 3) Go on Full Metal Jousting show 4) DJ at the White House(With Snoop of course) 5) Enter a hog dog eating contest(Shouldn't be that hard eating all that pork. He should be used to pork living in D.C.) 6) Spend a week on the Jersey Shore show 7) Learn to belch the alphabet(Then do it on C-Span) 8) Go on tour with Kiss ( He can sing lead with Gene Simmons) 9) Teach Joe Bidden how to read (This should take a whole term to accomplish) 10) Sing on American Idol
Below is a picture of a frozen pizza that Jennifer a.k.a Veronica a co-worker of mine bought at a local store and adopted. She was expecting to have a little morsel of pizza goodness (Who would expect less?) but instead she was very disappointed to see that mess below.
You may be asking what did she do. Well, she sent that picture and an e-mail to Jack's. Jack's upon receiving the e-mail sent Jennifer a coupon for a free pizza. Really? One free pizza for the inconvenience. Jack, I think you could have done a little better than that. Jack, what about the cost of gas, the time, and the frustration of losing a meal. You should have sent five of six coupons. (Could that coupon affect corporate bonuses? Hmmmmm!)
Just look at that! Someone must have been in a hurry on Friday night to get to the bar. One of Jack's finest was working (or not ) that night at the ol' Pizza Company. They were in such a hurry to get to that bar that they forgot to put sauce on the crust, in fact the only thing that did make it to the crust was the cardboard which was covered with the rest of the ingredients. (Nice, different, but nice)
All I can say is brilliant!
Maybe the folks at Guinness can help the folks at Jack's learn to make a pizza in the correct order. I tell you what. I will help you out Jack (I hope I am notbeing too informal here by calling you Jack) because I know a thing or two about making pizzas since I worked in a pizza place for a couple of years.
Leon's easy guide to making a good pizza for Jack's employees
1) Lay out dough
2) Spread sauce on dough
3) Spread cheese over sauce (evenly)
4) Place ingredients on cheese (use a clockwise motion so you don't get confused, noon is straight up and clockwise goes right)
5) Place in heated oven (this step is important this step is for your customers not employees)
**Notice nowhere does it say lay cardboard between crust and ingredients**
**Please make sure that the directions are followed in order to ensure product quality**
To the executives at Jack's if these instructions are too hard to follow please contact me and I will make an instructional video. Yes, before you ask I will use Disney characters to explain the process so you won't lose your train of thought.
P.S. One coupon, Jack, Jack, Jack. You could have done better. Shame on you!
Have you ever had ninjas get into your home? I hate when ninjas get into your house they are so hard to get rid of. They are worse than roaches. The last time they got into me house it took months to repair the damage they did. Ninjas also will eat you out of house and home. Don't let their skinny frames fool you they pack away the goods. They leave their waepons laying around everywhere. I could go on and on.
Just remember you can't believe everything you see or in this case what you don't see.
"You're telling me I could have had a V-8 instead of neck surgery. Will modern marvels never cease to amaze me?"
What billionaire boys do with their money
"The first thing I am going to buy with my billions is a pony and I am going to name him Greg."
Another crackpot idea to close the federal deficit
"Yes, I know that this sounds crazy but that is what we intend on doing. Homeland Security is going to sell NFL knock offs in order to help balance the budget."
